"I'm constantly being told how to drive": unsolicited "help" and lessons

Don't stress out your family, friends or colleagues by explaining to them how to drive.

And if you don't feel safe, then drive yourself or don't ride with them at all if you don't trust them.

🗣️ The irresistible urge to explain

A client recently expressed how annoyed she was when her husband kept telling her how to act on the road, despite the fact that she had been driving for many years and was confident in her skills.

Another client, plagued by shame and guilt, regretted how he used to lose control when his wife failed to change lanes in time or took the wrong turn.

You won't believe it, but both sides have a right to feel that way!

🙀 Worrying is normal

I remind you that every year about 1.2 million people are killed on the roads, and 20 to 50 million are injured.

I’m not talking about the millions of cases where a harmless car accident takes place, or a serious accident is narrowly avoided. In other words, getting killed on the road is easy.

So being nervous about comments is as normal as being nervous when the driver ignores your comments. Both sides fear for their lives.

🤝 Let’s consent

Of course, it's completely normal for novice drivers to state openly: "Look, I still feel like a dummy, so I'd be happy to use your help."

In such a case, you’re absolutely welcome to comment, explain, teach, and discipline, as long as the driver agrees.

The problem is when the comments are unsolicited and rather come from a desire to demonstrate one's knowledge, superiority, or unspoken fears and insecurities.

Conversely, if you don’t feel safe on the road with your family member or significant other, clearly communicate your emotions and expectations (e.g. “do not exceed the speed limit”), take the wheel into your own hands or get the driving license yourself.